Please read the following carefully as to avoid any awkwardness during our friendship. I have spent a lot of time thinking about what makes me comfortable and how I prefer interactions to play out and this is how I have decided is most comfortable for me and what is likely best for both of us. Obviously, there are no rules that are really one size fits all we need to set some ground rules first to have a starting point.
- 1. The Default Safe Word is “Red”
- 2. Do Not Talk About Donations (They will be placed in the red box in the bathroom)
- 3. No Drugs Allowed
- 4. No Smoking
- 5. No Weapons, No Exceptions
- 6. You Break It, You Replace It
- 7. No Cell Phones in Play Room
- 8. No Bare Skin on Furniture
- 9. Shoes Off upon entry
- 10. Ask Before Using Toys
- 11. Ask Before Touching Anyone
- 12. Flush a small amount TP only, no other items
If you break any of my rules, limits or violate any of my wishes whether they be related to personal safety or otherwise, you will be asked to leave promptly and you will not be issued a refund. By continuing using this website you are agreeing to those conditions in the event that you choose to arrange a session.
By seeking a session with me you are acknowledging that you understand that I will NOT be engaging in any sexual contact with you and that any attempt made by you to procure such services will result in the immediate termination of any contact between. Although there can be some intimate and sexual themes present during my sessions, I do not engage in any illegal or profoundly unsafe activities. This means that if you approach me seeking an escort type experience I will have to decline.
By seeking to engage in any BDSM related activities you are acknowledging that you are aware that some activities may carry some personal risk.
By using this website and seeking a session with me you are acknowledging that you do not hold me accountable for any physical harm that you may sustain in my care as a result of your appointment with me. You also agree to not hold me responsible for anything that may not go according to plan as a result of something you request, suggest or otherwise put into motion to make happen before, after, during or as a result of you session. You also understand and accept that I am not a doctor, medical professional or licensed educator but simply a knowledgeable source who has decided to graciously share her knowledge in a mentoring capacity. Therefore I am not bound by the same agreements or liabilities.
To ensure that you will be keeping your appointment with me, if you are a new friend I will ask for a non-refundable deposit that can be sent in the form of a gift card. If for some reason you need to cancel, this deposit will be forfeit.
Cancellations & No Shows
If for some reason you are unable to make your appointment with me, please let me know as soon as possible. Below is an outline of my expectations based on when you cancel.
Cancellations that occurs the same week as the appointment:If you cancel in the same week of our scheduled appointment, I will in the future require you to place a deposit for any future session.
3 hours: If you cancel after confirming your appointment with me/less than 3 hours before our scheduled meeting time, I will require that you pay for your session, regardless of your attendance Once I have received your cancellation fee, I will be happy to hold part of that payment as a credit towards a future session.
No Shows: If you confirm your appointment and do not show up and you do not contact me within 24 hours of our scheduled meeting time and explain that there were extenuating circumstances, I will expect you cover the entire cost of the session and give me a deposit before I will book with you again.
No Confirmation: A no confirmation is a no show, unless you have a solid history of reliability with me in which case it is forgivable.
Trust & Communication
You are coming to me for a reason, you need something from me and in return I expect you to communicate clearly what your needs are. Sometimes you may not be able to clearly communicate verbally and that’s okay. What I need most from you is the promise that you tell me when something is not okay and most importantly of all, that you will give me the opportunity to help to fix it. No one can guarantee that they won’t make a mistake, anyone who tries is lying, what I am telling you is that as long as you communicate clearly and compassionately I will do my best to be accountable and fix whatever is wrong.
Trust & Risks
I do not play like most people, I play on deep levels and I hit buttons when they need to be hit. I take risks and I am very risk aware- I will not lie to you about any risk involved in anything we do. I will not ask you to do anything that I do not think isn’t reasonably safe but I do expect you to listen to me when I give you information and take personal responsibility. While you are in my presence, you are in my care but it is also not my job to take the fall for a mistake that you do not want to learn from. I believe that we all have a lot to gain from our mistakes and I would not feel like I had done right by you if I had taken that away from you, although that does mean for some uncomfortable conversations.
Honesty vs Lying
I talk a lot about honesty/trust and sometimes that doesn’t always mean telling “the truth”. For example, the name you will know me as is a lie but our relationship will likely be deeper than people who have known you for decades. Sometimes, details of the truth are irrelevant like where you grew up or who you married or if you have kids but sometimes the difference between telling the truth and telling a tiny white lie is all that matters. Most of your life, doesn’t matter to me because it’s not really my business. If you want to share your martial status, I will support you and I won’t judge you either way but regardless of whether you actually tell me or not I will be able to tell based on what you talk about, what you don’t talk about, how you talk about it and what your face does when I look at you. People are transparent, especially the ones who think they are good liars. So if I ask you a question, it is best to not lie to me.
Know Your Place
I don’t mean “know your place” in a commanding way or as an off-handed insult- Have you ever watched a pack of dogs meet a new dog? Trouble only starts when there is a miscommunication about who is where in the power structure. If you are meeting me to blow off steam for a couple hours and play a role, that’s cool. If you are lost in your life and need someone to help you whip everything back into shape that is cool too but I will act very differently with you than I will if you tell me you just want to blow off some steam for a couple hours. In neither situation are you “topping me from the bottom” but rather I am adjusting myself to the situation appropriately based on the information I am given. The better you can share your needs, the better we will jive.
Let Me Lead
You can tell yourself whatever you like to feel comfortable with me but at the end of the day, you are drawn to me because you want someone who is pragmatic, empathetic, calculating, sexy and other worldly to take the reigns for a while and that’s okay. You can try to lead me to making the choices you want but at the end of the day I’m going to do what I want and what I think is best for both you and me. Given the state of our engagement, your growth is a priority so I will do my utmost best to lead you to the best outcome for you personally by creating the situation for you or setting up the cards in such a way that they fall in your favor.
You Will Make Mistakes (And It’s Okay)
I don’t think we talk about the benefits of making mistakes often enough in regular culture, never mind kink culture. I accept that absolutely everyone will make mistakes and sometimes it may impact me negatively. If it does, I will say something and as part of the contract of open communication that I expect from everyone I offer that in return; When you make a mistake, I will forgive you and give you the opportunity to remedy it if it calls for it, otherwise we can just move on and continue with our friendship.