Seattle Prodomme

Top 5 Questions Everyone asks a Dominatrix

Seattle Dominatrix Ruby Enraylls in her seattle dungeon with a Slave

Have you ever wondered what your Dominatrix’ favorite bdsm activity is? Or how you can be a better a slave? Perhaps the following can point you in the right direction. Below are my 5 most frequently asked questions and my answers. You might find the questions and their answers a bit surprising. Seattle Dominatrix Ruby Enraylls has the answers to your questions and some tips.

What is your favorite thing to do in a session?

It depends on my connection with the person I’m playing with. Having overlapping interests is important. I’m big on bondage, predicaments and power exchange. I really enjoy mind fucks and getting to be creative. I often tend to get really into a theme for a while. A bit ago it was medical then ADBL, chastity roleplay scenarios, prisoner stuff… it’s always something and my specific interests seem to rotate and shift. I enjoy curating an experience for someone.. The more creative the better. I like longer scenes so I can build up ideas and get to know someone, knowing someone over a longer period of time helps with this as well. Nothing can beat intimate knowledge of the inner workings of someone.

What got you into BDSM and the Femdom lifestyle?

Like many of the people I talk to, I have been kinky for as long as I can remember. If you’ve read my about me, I talk about being kinky when I was pretty young, when it was literally just a game. I don’t see anything wrong with that, although many people I’ve spoken to want to find the reason they are into bdsm. This implies to me that it is something to be fixed when I don’t think that’s true. That’s like saying any preference is inherently wrong. It’s my belief that a homogeneous world is pretty dull, among other things.

But I digress. I’ve always had an interest in Bdsm and the very first adult images I found were femdom related. So it seems normal that I would trend that direction, especially considering that I was raised in a female dominant environment.

Are other people into my fetish?

The shortest answer is yes. I’ve played with many, many people and I can tell you with complete confidence that even if someone hasn’t engaged in your particular fetish, there’s definitely an interest. We live in a kinky world. The biggest barrier to entry is unfortunately, shame.

What do you find attractive in a submissive/slave?

The evil variation of this question is “will you go on a date with me” or worse “can I be your live in slave?” Before asking such questions, consider the one posed above and ask yourself “what do I like most about me?” Personally what I like most about my slaves is that they are considerate, kind and respectful. Every person I notice has a willingness to consider the needs and desires of others and makes an effort to do so. It’s often small things that make the biggest impressions.

Seattle Dominatrix Ruby Enraylls is dressed in black latex with her latex slave in her Seattle BDSM Dungeon where she takes requests for Femdom and mistress sessions

What can I do to have the best session with my Domina?

Communicate! Clearly, honestly and respectfully. Sending a long fantasy and play by play isn’t particularly helpful to be completely honest. Writing out a list of yes’s and no’s, hard and soft limits and any specific things you want to try is a great way to start. I prefer to communicate such things at the beginning of the session unless there is something you think I won’t have or something that will need to be prepped for or negotiated. As we get to know each other more, I find that sometimes planning gets a bit more elaborate and more communication before we meet up is necessary or desired.

Sizing Women’s Clothes for Sissies, Feminization & Crossdressing

womens clothing sissy size guide

All around the world, women lament the chore of trying to divinate the size of their clothes.

When trying to figure out your size in women’s clothes as a Sissy, for feminization or crossdressing it gets a bit more complicated.

0 here, 12 there, 40 over there. It makes no sense. That’s just crossing countries. Try crossing brands. If I look into my jeans drawer I can find 26, 27, 28, 29, 2, 4, 6, xx small, small, medium and one size fits all. Who could possibly figure out how to order pants when you’re coming from a world of waist by length? I guess what I’m saying here is that no brand is standard in sizing when it comes to women’s clothing and the material and cut makes a huge difference in the fit. You never really know how something will fit until you have it on but usually size guides for sites will lend some help.

The trick comes in several parts.

This is an important tool you’ll need, however.

Know your measurements
However you’re planning on dressing, you better take your bust, waist and hip. The bust is the biggest part of your chest, waist is the smallest, hip is the biggest part of your hips/butt.

For bonus points, measure your neck, around your thigh, your bicep, the width of your shoulders, the length of your arm and the length of your leg. Now you can get fitted for anything!

Read size charts
Seriously. If the site you’re ordering from doesn’t have one, try to google one for the brand. It will save you a lot of time.

Understand fabrics
The stretchier the fabric the more give it has and the more you can fudge measurements. So look at materials and Google that if you are unsure, same with reviews. Common stretchy fabric names are lycra, elastane and spandex.

Now you are all set to order some clothes! If you need some one on one consulting, feel free to contact me and I would be happy to help you.

Service Opportunities

seattle dominatrix seeks maid

Have you ever wanted to serve me?
Well today is your lucky chance.

Much like any busy person, I have an endless to do list that I never seem to get to the bottom of and an endless list of things that always need prepping, preparing or acquisition. In other words: Errands and chores.

I won’t keep things too long and arduous but I do like to keep things fun so consider this an invitation for an application. You may email my gmail account Rubyenraylls@gmail.com with your application and qualifications.

I will be shortly posting tasks here as well.

What type of submissive or slave are you?

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What is your submissive play style?

A while ago I retweeted an image on Twitter roughly about different types of subs. That image is somewhat inaccurate, I think but I retweeted it because I thought it was funny and I didn’t expect people to really ask me about it. Then I started thinking about different types of “subs” for a lack of a better term. I have often thought about the different driving forces behind what composes kink, BDSM, fetish, etc, however that is a post for a different day. So I began thinking about the motivations behind each different type of sub I have observed. There will be a follow up to this post because I think there are more sub classifications beyond just these.

So, why does it matter what type of sub/what your play style is? (I think your play style is actually more accurate.) It gives you more information about yourself and what you’re seeking out of your interactions with your Domme/Mistress/etc.

Also, keep in mind that people use titles with their own discretion so “slave” may mean something to one person but something completely different to another person. It’s always important to ask when negotiating. (For example in online Domme communities “slave” basically means “submissive man” whereas in lifestyle BDSM communities a “slave” refers to someone that is “owned property” and is usually a relationship title rather than something you just call someone.)

So these titles are in part borrowed from what I have observed and in part my own creation. Moving along.

Submissive

A submissive is an umbrella term for someone with submissive desires who wants to be dominated. They have a whole range of interests in the BDSM or fetish realm. They may be casual or extremely serious and devoted to a Mistress. BDSM is a whole world of self expression for them. It’s a type of powerful play or sexual expression.

Slave

A slave is largely the same as a submissive with the exception that they tend to be more deeply involved lifestyle and tend to have one or more long term connections with Mistresses. Their real life outside play tends to be much more intertwined with kink and they are focused on “serving” in whatever form that takes for them. That’s not to say that a submissive can’t have domestic relationships that step outside the realm of the bedroom. However, I would say the level of commitment required for someone to make that sort of investment usually involves some sort of collar. Regardless of what title you assign to that relationship.

Bottom

A bottom is someone who much like a submissive is also experiencing kink for the purposes of self expression, play or sexual expression but the focus isn’t power exchange. They may engage in very hard play that pushes some very hard limits that you would only see from people deeply involved in heavy D/s relationships. Bottoms are experience chasers, limit pushers and they want to see how everything feels and process the fuck out of it. The good and the bad.

Fetishist

A fetishist is someone who seeks the deep exploration of something particularly specific. They can be all over the map as far as the D/s scale and their involvement in the BDSM scene. Their focus is exploration of whatever their particular fetish is and hopefully you talked about it before and also hopefully it’s your thing too!

Explorer

An explorer I would put neutrally on the D/s scale as they usually have no idea where they sit but it’s always fun to find out! Maybe they have no interest in D/s at all or maybe they really want to sit at your feet and suffer! An explorer is just that, an unknown.

Sensualist

A sensualist also doesn’t fall on the D/s scale but nothing makes them happier than putting a big smile on your face. Nothing makes Mistress happier than someone who wants to make her happy! The focus is typically not the harsh aspect of BDSM but sensation and sensuality.

I hope that helped shed some light on different types of submission for you!